Ask America Inc. Oakland, California 94661 firstname.lastname@example.org 510-338-0000
Was it ok to hit that woman?
Let's get this out of the way. I'm a guy. Ok, good, now that that's settled, let me get into it. (Caution: Long but interesting.)
I was at a bar with some friends one time and I was in charge of getting the next round. So, I went up to the bar to order some beers when this woman comes up next to me and shoves her way in between me and an empty bar stool, damn near knocking me to the floor. She was pretty flagrant with her movement so I assumed she was drunk. She looks at me and says, "Excuse me, sorry, I need to get the bartender's attention." Ok, so fine, cut in line, whatever, I don't mind. She's visibly impatient and begins to climb the bar stool. She started mildly jumping up and down on one end of it which caused it to tip over backwards. I saw it happening and reached to grab the stool. Well, when I successfully stopped her from suffering a concussion, she responds by telling me that I should keep my hands to myself. Right, ok. I said, "Sorry, my bad," and grabbed all my drinks. But, then she continued, "Um, yeah, ya know, that could be considered sexual harassment." That just sounded beyond stupid to me, so I said, "Ok, great, thanks. Have fun then."
Now, I'm happily back at my seat, sipping a lager and chatting with my friends. About 30 minutes go by and I can see this girl from across the room talking with her friends, her movements getting more violent. She then starts to walk over. I'm begging that she's just passing me to get to the restroom. Nope! She comes right up to me and starts (abbreviated), "Ya know, I don't think it's funny what you said, and sexual harassment is very serious, and I could have you sent to prison." I respond, "Well, sorry you feel that way, didn't mean to bother you." She then DEMANDS an apology. Usually, I would just say sorry and move on, but this was just obnoxious. I refused.
She then started acting like a five-year-old, crossing her arms, pouting and demanding more. I did not oblige. Here's where things take a turn. She says "Listen, I've been raped before, it's not funny!" I made the mistake of laughing because this whole thing was just silly. Yes, I understand how serious rape is but the manner in which this "lesson" was being presented was funny to me. So, I laughed for a split second. She didn't take too kindly to that and smacked me on the shoulder. I took this as playful slap like she was flirting so I laughed and half-heartedly apologized. She then smacks me across the face.
I didn't react. I told her to go back and sit with her friends, some of whom were already trying to calm her down. She slaps me again and yells in my face, "Rapist! Rapist! Rapist!". I told her to stop. She didn't and slapped me again. This time, her friends try to grab her. This prompts her to break free and legitimately attack me. She pulls my hair and starts punching wildly. Blow after blow, I felt it in my neck, and my chest, and a couple grazed my face. Her friends pulling her back only made her pull on my hair more, so, at that point, I said "F*ck it." I held her by the wrist of the arm that was on my hair and karate chopped her in the upper ribs, fairly hard. I'm not a fighter, I don't even know if karate chopping is a real thing outside of comedy, but it was the most effective thing one tier down from an actual punch; it knocked the wind out of her a bit and she let go. She began to cry and complain and yell more as she was carried off. I may have come off looking like an ass but I think I had it in my right to defend myself.
What do you think?