Worst Thanksgiving Ever

This Thanksgiving was the absolute worst holiday I've ever had. I got to my family's house in the morning and heard screaming from inside before I even opened the door. My mom and my sister (who's 22) have been known to go at it every once in a while, but this was next level. Apparently, my mom deleted some Facebook messages from her phone and my sister apparently thought that was really suspicious. The screaming went on for 30 minutes before I couldn't take it anymore. My sixteen-year-old sister was in the kitchen while they were fighting and no one seemed to think that it was inappropriate to be doing that in front of her. I grabbed my sister and took her out for coffee after yelling at them to pull themselves together before we got home. We didn't even end up having a Thanksgiving dinner. I'm still so angry at them for being so selfish and immature that I haven't spoken to any of them since Thanksgiving. What should I do?

The Grinch Who Stole Xmas

I have 5 kids and Christmas time can get pretty expensive. My second oldest child does a lot of extracurricular activities with his school that cost a ton of money. Trips to Boston, Montreal and Chicago are just some of the places he has gone. I have spent thousands of dollars to support these activities. Is it OK if I spend a lot less on him for Christmas than I do for my other children?

Missing my mom

So, my husband and I moved to a completley different state about 4 hours away from home and I really miss my mom, like, a ton. She's my best friend. We talk 4 times a day even if we have nothing to say. I resent my husband for moving us so far away, especially since I protested it for a long time. Now I'm in a completley different sapce (I grew up in the city and now we're in farmland), with no friends and no mom. It's not the same talking to her on the phone and sometimes I cry because it's been so long since I've seen her. I know it sounds clinggy, but I have a great relationship with her that my husband just doesn't understand. Any tips on how to manage this?

Dealing with Racist Grandpa at Thanksgiving

Let me just start off by saying that I love my family. My cousins and I are all around the same age and we always have such a fun time when we're hanging out together. Holidays with my fam are usually nice and chill as long as the conversation stays away from political topics, which isn't always easy. The cousins and I are all somewhere on the liberal scale, while our parents mostly lean conservative. The parents aren't usually the problem, though. It's grandpa who ends up taking things too far and making sweeping generalizations about entire races of people. It's the kind of ingrained racism that can't be argued away with patience or logic and it always makes the rest of us very uncomfortable. I almost want to skip Thanksgiving this year and throw a Friendsgiving or something, but I know it would really disappoint my parents and cousins.

Monster-in-law

My mother in law and I have never, ever gotten along. We are polar opposites on every spectrum from money to fashion to family, etc. Even my husband and the rest of our family understands that 80% of the time we just can't be in the same room with each other. When it starts we just can't stop screaming until one of us storms out of the room. Lately, however, she's been really plesant, but I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop and she'll come back with avengance. I'm not sure what the deal is, but I'm still having trouble looking past the no-good things she's done to me in the past, thoughts?

My Wife's Cooking is Terrible

Family dinners are not good, neither is any meal for that matter, what should I do? My wife has been making terrible food for what is approaching 20 years now. I should have known after that horrendous Baked Ziti she made for dinner on her first try, but I was optimistic. In 20 years the cooking hasn't gotten any better. I can not afford to eat out everyday for dinner. What I have been doing is eating a good lunch and just tolerating the dinners.

Cousin Making Dangerous Choices

My cousin (who is like a sister to me) is 24 years old and has a 5 year old son. She's an amazing single mom and has always put her son first, but she recently disclosed to my mom that she intends to travel all the way to the Philippines with her 5 year old. She told my mom that it's part of a teaching experience for her online college degree, but she keeps calling it a vacation, and the facts aren't adding up. There's a guy from the Philippines on her Facebook, and his profile says he's dating her, but her profile doesn't say she's dating him. She's never mentioned him, and it's really concerning.

She also said she won't tell her dad she's going until 2 days before she plans to leave. It's all extremely suspicious, and I'm worried she's being lured to a foreign country by a guy she's never met before. Even the best case scenario is she is going down there on a legitimate "teaching experience," but she's an anti-vaxxer, so her 5 year old son is going to be exposed to foreign diseases in another country that he doesn't have the immune system to fight off.

She's 24 years old and there's no way to stop her from doing whatever she wants, but my mom and I don't feel it's right to do and say nothing when there are so many red flags going off. We're the only ones in the family who know, because she doesn't trust anyone else. If we break her trust, we're concerned she will have no one left in the family that she trusts, and she won't come to us anymore if she needs help. But we can't do nothing, right?

How can I get my mom to stop over sharing?

My mom and I have had a very close relationship since I was a kid. I know I can tell her anything, I mean anything, but I like to keep some things private. She, on the other hand, tells me every little detail about every part of her life. This was fine until she started going through what I'm pretty sure is a midlife crisis (I'm not trying to be mean. She's just having trouble with her marriage, dealing with my troublemaking sister, and generally just realizing that she's not living her life the way she wanted). Now she's having an affair and experiencing a sexual awakening of sorts. I'm happy for her, in a complicated way, but I don't need to hear the details of her newfound sex life. How do I nicely let her know that I'm uncomfortable with the topic?

Should I cook at my MIL's house

I like to eat healthy and feed my kids healthy foods. When we visit my MIL, she wants to cook all of the nostalgic meals that she made for my husband when he was little, and he likes this too. The foods are not healthy and I don't like them. When she comes to my house, I want to cook but she also controls what we all eat as a family at my house. How should I handle this, my husband is very defensive about his mom.

Your Parents Or Your Kids

Call my crazy but when it comes to devoting my time and energy, I'd rather spend it on my own kids than on my parents. My husband, on the other hand, consistently chooses his parents over our two children. For example, he will choose to give his parents a ride to the airport over taking/pick up one - or both - our kids to/from a playdate. It's frustrating as hell. I love my parents and I am there for them when I can, but with life being so full and hectic, there are many times I will tell them I can't help them with whatever they need and instead focus on my children. Am I wrong? Adults should be able to solve their own problems. And it's the children who should be the priority, no? My husband disagrees with me.

previous
next